…mason college,festac…all big galz now!…
HOW GOOD A PARTY GUEST CAN YOU BE?
May my guest not oppress me with his visit and when he leaves, may he not go with a hunch back. Does that sound a bit ancient? Well, it is an Igbo adage that simply underscores the need for a guest to be considerate and responsible.
Being a guest certainly is not synonymous with being an unrelieved burden. Of course, we are not saying that you don’t have a right to be taken care of and pampered by the person hosting you. But don’t you think you also can contribute to the success or failure of the party?
There are some people you’d solemnly promise yourself never to have back as visitors, while there are yet others, you can’t just wait to have at your parties.
What then is the secret? Well, here are tips from Ms Donna Prelli, which will make you the kind of good guest who is welcome at anybody’s table.
EDUPEDIA NOTES: The following suggestions follow patterns (or customs/traditions) not yet very common in Nigeria. But our students ought to know for future reference…
THIS IS HOW WE DO IT! WHEN IN ROME DO IT LIKE THE ROMANS
1. Respond to your invitation as soon as you know (and by the stated RSVP). That way, your host/hostess can make plans knowing the exact number of guests who will be attending.
2. Ask if you can contribute anything to the meal such as an appetizer, side dish or dessert. The hostess may be relieved to have someone take charge of one of the courses for her. However, do not just bring a dish without checking first with your hostess. She might be making something very similar already or your dish may clash with her carefully planned menu. Similarly, if you bring a bottle of wine as a gift for the hostess you shouldn’t expect it to be served with the meal. The hostess may already have selected the wines she wishes to complement her meal.
3. Not a cook? Then offer to bring a table or buffet centerpiece. Once again, don’t bring this if your hostess had declined the offer. She may already have had her own specific decorating scheme planned.
4. If you have the time, offer to come a little earlier than the other guests, to help with pre-party set up. But if your offer is accepted, don’t be late- your hostess will be counting on you.
5. Arrive at a dinner party on time. Some hostesses plan the timing of their meals very precisely, and you wouldn’t want to hold up the meal and spoil the food for everyone else.
6. When the meal is over, ask your hostess if you can help clear the table. But if her answer is “no, thanks”, then just relax and leave things alone. She might not wish for everyone to feel rushed, as their plates are taken from them mid –bite.
7. If you see the hostess frantically cleaning in the kitchen after the meal is over, offer to help.
8. Do your part to be friendly and make conversations with other guests. You’re part of the chemistry that will make the party a success.
9. Don’t raise a conversation topic that you know will cause dissension among a particular group of guests.
10. Drink responsibly. Your hostess may be serving alcoholic beverages to complement her meal, but it doesn’t mean she wants to have a group of sloppy drunks on her hands at the end of the party!
…one of the finishing touches classes on table manners at mason college,festac…
LET’S TALK ABOUT ‘R.S.V.P.’ WHICH WE SOMETIMES REGARD AS MEANING “ REGRETS ONLY S’IL VOUS PLAIT”!
Many of us must have seen it on our invitation cards. There is hardly any invitation card you get without those four alphabets. But how many of us know what it really entails?
Why do I ask this question?
You hear people often complain that host often do not know the number of people to plan for, despite the fact that they have sent out a particular number of invitation cards. And if you ask the hostesses why they would tell you they were yet to receive firm indications whether guests planned to attend their parties, even when ‘R.S.V.P.’ is clearly printed on the invitation card.
Well, for those of us who may want to plead ignorance, ’R.S.V.P.’ comes from the French, “repondez s’il vous plait”. This simply means, “Please, respond”.
And for those who already know this and still don’t make any move towards responding, it could be read as a display of arrogance.
Another thing people should know about this issue is that ‘R.S.V.P’ is written on an invitation cards, it means the invited guests must tell the host whether they plan to attend the party. It does not mean to respond only if you’re not coming, and – the expression “regrets only”, is reserved for that instance. It means the host needs a definite head count for the planned event, and needs it by the date specified on the invitation.
Remember, an incomplete list of respondents can cause many problems for a host, including difficulty in planning food quantities, issues about minimum guarantee with catering halls, uncertainty over the number of party favors and difficulties in planning appropriate seating, among other things.
So, the next time you see ‘R.S.V.P.’ on an invitation you receive, please, call your host and respond promptly .
ORIGINAL WRITE-UP IN THE PUNCH BY CHINYERE FRED-ADEGBULUGBE.SLIGHT MODIFICATIONS MADE BY EDUPEDIA
…Jehovah’s children…extremely good in virtually all things!…
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